A Memoir
by paxromilly
Summary: The 4th Great Ninja War is finally over. Naruto has all the time in the world to relax but he wants to publish a book about all his adventures. Sakura and Sasuke are worried. What if he writes about them?
1. A Blossoming Author

Disclaimer: All property rights belong to Kishimoto and his lovely cohorts. I take no credit.

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Konoha has seen its share of troubles, but weaved itself out of great peril thanks to its number one knucklehead ninja, Naruto. What he lacked in intelligence, he made up for in strength, courage, and heart in the heat of battle. It was enough to make him the stuff of legend. He's been called a hero by the villagers ever since, but to those who knew him well he was just a simple boy of 17 who loved nothing more than to sleep, eat, and fight—or so they thought. It all began when Sakura came to visit.

"Naruto, I'm entering. I hope you don't mind. When you didn't answer the door I thought something might be wrong. Anyway, I bought you the milk you wanted."

"Great. Set it down on the table, will you?" he said, nonchalantly.

"Hey, not even a thanks?' She said, crossing her arms. "You know, I only did this because you said you were too busy to leave your house, but here you are sitting at your desk!"

"Sorry Sakura, I'm busy writing this very important scene. It requires the utmost concentration."

Sakura gasped. "You're writing a scene? You mean it's for a book?" she asked incredulously.

He stopped typing and turned back to look at her. "What do you mean? Of course it's for a book. I'm writing a story." He said sheepishly.

Sakura quickly caught herself and apologized, "I didn't mean it that way. It's just that you've never shown any interest in writing. I can't remember the last time you even picked up a pen! What are you writing about?"

His face lit up. "It's about all our adventures together from the time we were genins till now. It's going to be awesome." he said.

"Can I read it?" If it mentioned her, of course she wanted to see it.

His face dropped. "Well, no. It's not ready."

"Oh, that's okay. I can just read that draft you have." she smiled; unaware that Naruto began sweating bullets.

"No!" he yelled, "No one can read it yet. It's top secret. Anyway, it's 4 o'clock. Shouldn't you be training with Tsunade? I don't want to keep you here." Naruto's face was getting redder by the minute. He couldn't show her the draft because he knew she wouldn't like it and these days Sakura's strength was multiplying. He couldn't risk it. He just finished one Ninja war.

"Come to think of it, I do have to leave soon. But first, just what are you hiding?" She said, reaching her hand towards the typewriter, but Naruto pushed it away.

"Wait! Look, it's difficult enough writing with someone hovering behind you. This is my thing." He explained. He hoped it wouldn't offend her.

"Naruto," Sakura said sweetly, catching him completely by surprise, "I understand. You want privacy, that's all."

"Yeah, thanks. I need time to perfect it. It's like training, you know?"

"Of course. But I will read it, sooner or later, Naruto. You can't hide anything from me." she warned. Her green eyes bore holes into his blue ones. She wasn't letting him off the hook that easy. She bid him farewell and exited the room.

"N-no problem. I'll see you later." he said, relieved that she left. Sakura was scary sometimes.


	2. Forming a Plan

Sakura took one look at her gloves and sighed. She ripped a new hole in them fighting with Tsunade. They hung pitifully by a thread at the part where the hand fits. There was no remedy. She took them off and ceremoniously dumped them in the trash; they were her favorite gloves. Further down, she saw Sasuke and Kakashi talking in front of the Konoha hospital. Kakashi saw her and signaled her to come over.

"Good evening Sakura how was your day?" he said, smiling.

"Oh, fine. I ran some errands for my parents and Naruto, then finished training with Tsunade. You?"

"Sasuke and I concluded our training, too. Between us, Sasuke is becoming a little soft. He had to visit the hospital for a broken wrist."

Sasuke, who was right next to him, scoffed. "If I remember correctly, it was you, not me, who needed medical care. Anyway, we were just about to leave."

Sakura wanted to stay with them a little while longer so she brought up her most interesting piece of information. "Before you go, I thought I'd let you both know that Naruto is writing a book."

That halted right them in their tracks. Sasuke tried to act uninterested, but she noticed him lean slightly in her direction. Kakashi, however, seemed pleasantly surprised. "Really? Well, that kid is unpredictable." he said matter-of-factly.

"Yeah, I almost didn't believe it myself, but he was locked up in his room with a typewriter on his desk. He's so serious about it, too. He wouldn't let me read what he wrote." she laughed.

"I wonder what it's about." Kakashi admitted. Naruto, a writer? It was both ridiculous and yet strangely befitting. JIraiya was a writer, too. He wondered if he picked up the hobby from the legendary sennin.

"He said it's about us."

"About us? Whatever it is, it sounds like a diary to me."

"You really think so, Sasuke?" she asked.

"What else could it be?"

"I think you're on to something," Kakashi cut in, "He's probably writing down your quirks, flaws, and embarrassing moments. After all, a story wouldn't be complete without some drama."

Sakura blushed. "No way! I didn't realize. If Naruto writes down our secrets, then that means the whole village will know everything about us!"

"Us? I'm just a simple teacher." Kakashi said mischievously. He was really enjoying this.

"What do you mean!? You read those dirty old books." she pointed out.

"But everyone already knows so it's not a secret."

"Hold on. Naruto hasn't gotten it published yet. We still have time to stop him." Sasuke cut in. He didn't want anyone interfering with his life any more than Sakura did now that he finally moved back to Konoha after the war. His privacy was important to him and he didn't need to fuel rumors or crazy fan girl fantasies.

"Except he won't let us read it. How can we stop him if we don't know what it's about?" she asked.

"Simple." said Sasuke, "we sneak inside and read it without his permission. If it's okay, we leave him alone. If it's not, we confront him."

"He'll be upset if he finds out. I told him I'd wait until he's finished."

"By then it'll be too late. Look, it's not my problem if he throws a fit. I'll be damned if he gets such an embarrassing book published. Are you in?"

It didn't feel like she had any other choice. It was either let him publish it and risk humiliation or invade his privacy and ensure their secrets remained secret. It was a win-lose situation either way. But Sakura was no saint. Her curiosity sometimes got the best of her. She nodded approval.

"Are you in Kakashi?" she asked.

"Me? Oh, no. I'm busy. Have fun you two. Let me know if you need anything." With that, he left the two teenagers to fend for themselves.

Sasuke and Sakura immediately set out to work on a plan. If there was one thing he could count on, it was her eye for detail. Her level-headedness meant she could plan thoroughly and practically. For that, Sasuke was thankful. He had no idea where to begin. That's because he missed out on a lot since he left Konoha. Naruto was slightly different from before, definitely more mature, and he needed to get a feel for that. Sakura would help because the two were close.

"We should strike when he leaves his room, like during dinner." he said.

"Not likely. He's dead set on writing this. He's probably going to eat in. Ramen noodles, I bet. I think he'll take breaks, though. We can sneak in when he goes to the kitchen."

"Alright. We'll spy on him from the rooftops. As soon as he leaves, we'll rush in. That gives us 2-3 minutes to look for the paper, skim through it, and make a clean get-away."

"Sounds like a plan." she said.

"Good. We'll meet tonight at 6 p.m."

"Wait, Naruto eats dinner at 8 p.m."

Sasuke sighed. He eats that late? "Fine, 8 o'clock. Don't be late." He turned around and lept up high into the rooftops. She watched him speed away.

Yeesh. Since when did she need to be reminded not to be late? Sakura walked back to her house, which was not far from the hospital, to get ready. She needed a long hot shower, new clothes, and a hearty meal to ease her nerves. It felt ridiculous the more she thought about it, but Sasuke wanted to do it and she really wanted to make him happy. Not because she liked him, but because she wanted to feel like a team again.


	3. A Blunder

Sasuke arrived early to keep an eye on Naruto. It was policy that a ninja always observe his enemy before striking and it was a rule he intended to follow without exception. He lay perched above the apartment complex across the street from Naruto's house, quiet and still as a hawk. It was no picnic. Sasuke watched his teammate scratch his butt, sneeze, and crumple up five pages all in one hour. Yes, even his own patience was wearing thin, but hoped he'd see a breakthrough now that it was almost 8 o'clock and Sakura would be due to arrive any moment.

As if on cue, he heard the soft patter of footsteps on tile. Sakura walked in from behind wearing a pair of navy capris and a loose pink t-shirt. Her pale skin glowed especially against the moonlight and smelt of fresh flowers—a vast difference from the afternoon. In any case, he was glad she could relieve him of his boredom although he wouldn't let her see it.

"Not late am I?" she teased.

"Hn. It's 8 o'clock and Naruto hasn't budged."

"Well, of course not!" She rolled her eyes. "He's not a robot. Let's wait a couple minutes. I know he'll be hungry soon."

She took a seat by the roof's edge and patted the space next to her. "Aren't you tired of brooding?" she laughed.

'Not really', Sasuke thought, but he relented at her gesture. He noticed her smile again when he sat down; a brief, almost nostalgic smile. Not a word was said between them. Sasuke noted it had been a while since he talked to her properly—longer still if he excluded anything related to training. They weren't particularly close when they were genin. Heck, every moment spent with her was just her way to get him to notice her. It's not that he hated her. She was his teammate, but he didn't understand her. So maybe…it was time he started to.

"Sakura, does Naruto still like playing video games?"

"Huh? Yeah. He plays them every day when he gets the chance. Why?"

"No reason." he said, turning his head to hide the embarrassment creeping onto his face. Did he really just ask about video games? He didn't even care about them. This bonding thing was more frustrating than he thought.

"You okay?"

"It's nothing. Just keep an eye on him. "

"Okay, but we should all play together someday." she said smiling.

"Let's not."

Sakura shrugged and continued watching her other teammate type. The signs of fatigue were finally setting in. Naruto's shoulders began to sag and his fingers became clumsy and unfocused. His typing slowed down to a turtle-like pace. She watched him rub his stomach fervently.

"Did you see that?

Sasuke nodded, "He's hungry."

They watched the hunger pangs attack Naruto with quick ferocity. He shifted uncomfortably in his seat, trying to ignore them, but the longer he waited the more intense the pain became until he finally couldn't stand it any longer. Naruto got up, took his draft, and locked it inside his desk drawer. Then, promptly left the room for dinner.

"No", Sakura moaned, "That ruins everything."

"We're ninjas. A locked drawer won't change anything. I'll be careful."

"You?"

"One of us has to stay to keep lookout." he deadpanned.

Before she could say another word, Sasuke leapt down and crossed the street. He crept up beside the window to Naruto's bedroom, which thankfully was only on the first floor. The window was closed, but Sasuke swiftly unlocked the hatch and let himself in. He estimated he had two minutes left before Naruto returned.

First, he went looking for the key, but there was one problem: Piles of dirty magazines, empty cups of coffee, and crumpled balls of paper littered the entire room. Some piles even reached up to his knees. Not to mention there was a moldy slice of cake sitting atop the television that was bugging the hell out of Sasuke. He couldn't fathom how that idiot could stand living like this. The only clean thing was his desk, but he clearly saw the key wasn't where it belonged. Given the circumstances, it could take longer to find it.

Outside, Sakura sulked over her rotten luck. She didn't like the way Sasuke decided to go on ahead without her. He knew she wanted to read the story, too. Why, he'd be screwed if she hadn't told him about it. It was so boring to be the lookout when her skills had improved so much. Did he still think she needed to be babied? "Well mister, you need me now. I'm the lookout so I'm watching over you." she said haughtily.

Naruto was in the kitchen waiting for the water to boil. Instant ramen was god's gift to his people. His mouth was dying to taste the new flavor he bought the other day: spicy chicken broth. A bowl of hot noodles certainly hit the spot after a hard day's work and he should know. Writing a novel wasn't easy, not if one wanted to do it right, and the experience brought him closer to his old master Jiraiya. He didn't realize it then, but an author's job is just as important as a shinobi's…in its own way. However, he'd rather fight a thousand Tobis than sit at a desk all day wasting away. This was only a personal project. If all went well, he could finish the book tonight. Then he'll send it to Izumi, the local artisan, to have it leather-bound. Finally, an end was in sight. The sound of the kettle whistling broke his thoughts, grounding him and letting him know that the water was ready. He quickly took the lid off the ramen bowl and poured the hot water over the curly noodles.

Sakura watched Naruto from the window next door. When she saw him gathering up his dinner to eat in his room, she panicked.

"Oh no, Sasuke still hasn't found the key! What should I do?"

The only thing to do was to grab Sasuke's attention before Naruto found him looking through his stuff. But how? She tried yelling his name at the top of her lungs, but all she got in response was a fierce tongue-lashing from the old lady of the apartment whose roof she was standing on. The old woman threatened to call for help if she didn't leave immediately, making Sakura feel more flustered than before. She apologized profusely for disturbing her sleep, and to show her she meant well she moved to the tree standing across the apartment. Appeased, the old lady returned to her bedroom and left Sakura alone to save her friend.

"Now that that's over with, let's focus on the task at hand. I can't call him without that hag getting on my case and he's too busy to look up so I can't catch his attention from up here," she said, "And I definitely can't go down there because then we'd both be caught. Think, Sakura. Naruto's already heading to his room."

Right on cue, an acorn landed and hit Sakura's head.

"Ouch, what the—what's this? An acorn? Why, that's it! I'll just throw this at the window and get his attention this way." She picked another acorn off the leaves and aimed. Her brows furrowed with the utmost concentration. Then in one fluid motion, she pulled back her arm and swiftly let it go in the desired direction. The acorn went flying into the air until CRASH—the window broke.

At the moment, Sasuke was debating whether or not to burn a hole into Naruto's desk and deal with the consequences later, when an acorn came hurling through the window and hit him right in the eye.

"Agh, what the hell? Who threw this?" He said, gritting his teeth. His eye was throbbing badly. It felt like getting punched in the face by a bag of bricks. Luckily, it was just a bruise—one that was changing into an ugly shade of purple. Sasuke looked in the direction of the throw with his good eye and saw Sakura waving frantically. She was motioning for him to come back.

"Already? Shit." Before he could do anything, Sasuke heard the doorknob click. There was no choice; He had to hide. Without thinking, he dived under Naruto's bed before the blonde shinobi ever noticed anyone was sneaking inside his room.

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Sorry for the long break. I've been writing this in between filling out college applications. Who said transferring was easy? Anyway, I haven't forgotten about this story and I truly want to finish it. I have a feeling the next couple chapters will be even longer. As always, thank you for the reviews. Your comments help me grow as a writer and they brighten up my day. Keep reviewing and watch out for the next chapter. :D

-Pax


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